It is complicated

When diagnosed with a new ailment, I try to educate myself on what it is, what to expect, and how it works as much as I can. I don't go to medical school or anything but I do a lot of reading,  listening and asking questions.

I think I feel more comfortable with ailments when I understand them and can comprehend how they are affecting my body and my well being. Its helpful to me to know what is common vs what is unexpected and requires further attention.

At my RA diagnosis, I thought I knew a fair amount about it because my mother has had it for decades. But apparently I did not. It has been a learning curve. I finally thought, 8 months after diagnosis, that I was getting some where.

Then yesterday a friend sent me a link to a series of two articles in the New York Times which are questions answered by a rheumatologist on RA and its treatment. Then I found out how much more I didn't know. I read the comments at the end and found there is still even more I need to know about.

You can call me slow but I probably have decades where I can continue to learn about it even more.

If you want to educate your self on RA, here are parts one and two.

Time to take a break from Dr. Google

Dr. Google can kill us all off in our heads in a matter of seconds or minutes (depending on the speed of your internet provider). I have new ailments that I have been asking Dr. Google about. I also have continued to ask Dr Google about my other ailments. I have totally grossed out myself and made myself decide I will end up in chronic pain in a wheelchair in a matter of weeks.

I am not showing your actual links because that would mean finding the disgusting things again and going through it all so you will have to suffer with my descriptions.

• I found a picture of a woman with uncontrolled lymphedema in her arm. On one side she looked light a normal slight build, slender woman. On the other, her arm looked like it belonged to someone weighing about 400 lbs. 
• Then I found some pictures of what rheumatoid can do to one's feet since my feet really hurt recently. They showed all these x-rays of feet wit plates in them, turned up toes, collapsed arches, etc. 
• Then I found pictures of flesh eaten through to bone by rheumatoid.
• Then I found articles on the latest conflicting research on breast cancer screening and its value for older women.
• Then I found a comment page on people coping with fibromyalgia
• Then I found a list of sayings by people on 'you know when you have rheumatoid...' and realized I could agree with all of them.
• And more.

The more ailments you have the faster and easier you can kill yourself off.I need to step away from Dr. Google (and I need a trip to a Caribbean beach). But getting away from Dr. Google is easier and cheaper.